Wednesday, November 18, 2009

have any lights to donate?

Don't you love it when crack addicts give you advice to watch out for crack addicts?

Outside the AGO this evening, and a man drove up on his bike with a plastic basin of lights attached to the front of the bike.
The basin was glowing with multiple colours of flashing lights.
"have any lights to donate?" the man said,
I realized I was just about to get on my own bike but hadn't put my bike lights on.
"no, sorry, but thanks for reminding me"
"don't leave your bike lights on, you wouldn't leave your bike unlocked, you never know when a crack addict is going to come across it and think 'there's twenty bucks'... how about some blues" and the man started playing the accordion, he was rather good and started snapping along.
"thank you"
"do you have any money?, take me to dinner?"
"no, sorry i don't have any money"
"take me to dinner?"
I giggled "sure" I don't know what I expected his response to be but...
"seriously? I'll give you my number, if you are worried"
"oh...um.. I was... joking? thank you, have a great day" at this point there was a constant stream of pedestrians hollering to get past our two bikes.
"oh, I wasn't, you know there is no such thing as a bad day, just bad moments, when someone says 'have a great day' they, there is no such thing as a bad day, all days are great, only moments are bad, and people with bad attitudes hold on to those moments for the entire day."
"wow, that is really insightful"
"it's true there are no bad days, so when people say have a great day..." people continue to try to get past our two bike muttering or yelling "excuse me"
"thank you very much, have a good night"
"thank you"

As I road home I thought about how many great things came out of that conversation. I wish i had had the courage to sit and talk with him longer.

Father of A Boy Named Sue

OMG
so Cailin asked me who wrote the Johnny Cash song A Boy Named Sue.
Despite the fact that I am a Cash nut, I didn't know the answer.
We looked it up and found out Shel Silverstein who wrote where the sidewalk ends (1974) wrote it. AND he wrote a follow up. It is the perspective of the Father of the Boy named Sue.

Here it is sung my Shel Silverstein.


I found it rather disturbing but laughed rather hard. I Wish Johnny Cash had recorded it.

Friday, November 13, 2009

Chick-lit

From an article defending chick-lit:

"The truth is, women happily read books (and watch films and TV) aimed primarily at men. That's because women buy more and read more, full stop. They read thrillers, travel books, biographies – and yet the majority of these books are marketed for men. Women know they'll like it and give it a go. They'll happily pick up a copy of Porno, with a plastic female sex doll on the front. But men rarely try women's fiction, because they've been conditioned to think they can't pick up a book with a pink cover."

Everyone seems to have an opinion on chick-lit (or "commercial women's fiction," as the author of that piece calls it), but I wonder how many men actually have read any of those books. Interesting question.

P.S. I have most of the Shopaholic series, if anyone wants to loan a copy. Tempted, gentlemen?

Friday, November 6, 2009

A rant in honour of Rachel's Birthday

Nothing can get me into a rage quite like a visit to the hardware store.

God almighty, do I ever hate old hardware store men. I believe they are the most condescending and patronizing men in the world.

Hello, I am a young woman. I am looking for a tool/a home improvement item of some sort. I am not looking for a god damn lecture about the intricacies of drain pipe circumferences, thank you very much.



Happy Birthday Rachel, you Radical Vegan Feminist Terrorist!

Friday, October 30, 2009

Baker Street Irregular

Look at what I made! (I've decided to be Sherlock Holmes for Hallowe'en. A day before the 31st! This is a new record in my hallowe'en costume planning. I've never had so much forethought.)

Anyway, I made this badge and chuckled for about 10 minutes straight. Holmes loves Watson, don't tell me any different. I think I should make a "Dear Cocaine" badge as well.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Birds

The other day Rachel and I were talking about the local sports teams, as us gals are wont to do.

I said, "Beauchemin's arrival in Toronto is not yet working out as well as his splashdown in Anaheim, but his play is getting better along with the other big free-agent signing on defence, Mike Komisarek."

And she said, "Yes, but among the forwards, only the lesser lights such as Wayne Primeau, Colton Orr and Jay Rosehill have done their jobs."

Typical.


Okay, what actually happened was that I accidentally referred to the Toronto Blue Jays (or are they just 'Jays' now?) as The Maple Budgies.

Is this a new low in sports ignorance? Probably.

But, in my defense, I've had budgies on my mind lately. I just want to go on record as a bird supporter. I'm sick of people these days and their birdie trash talking.
"They are stupid"
"They are loud"
"They freak me out when they fly"

No. YOU are stupid. YOU are loud. YOU can't fly and YOU are jealous.


Birds are awesome.

(This post is dedicated to the memories of Merlin, Monty, Anakin, the one I found in the backyard and who never got a name that stuck, and bitchy Sky who died a year ago. RIP Budgie Pals! You are shredding God's wallpaper now.)

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Walking in Toronto

Two eventful things happened to me on the way home today. My paper bag busted open and I had to gather my belonging and rearrange them in the remaining bags. As I was doing this in the middle of the sidewalk on Dundas street an elderly Chinese (or at least I think Chinese) woman asked me if I was taking the streetcar.
elderly Chinese woman: "do you have token?"
me: "no,"
I cared on and she stood there looking at me, shuffling her bags from one arm to the next.
elderly Chinese woman: "do you have money?"
me: "yes, I have money" I figured out that she wanted to exchange my change for her token. Her English was really basic.
elderly Chinese woman: "I neet money... money for token"
me: "okay," and I started getting the money out of my pocket "two dollars" I said
"NO!" she exclaimed, I was startled, "NO! TWO SEVENTY FIVE"
I shock my head,
me: "but that is how much a token costs", perhaps I showed a little to much attitude and knowledge of the city, I think she might have assumed I was a visitor with all my bags.
elderly Chinese woman "NO! when you get on is two seventy fie,"
I shock my head, "but it only cost you two dollars"
"NO! NO!" she exclaimed again.
I don't know why she didn't offer two fifty, if she really needed the money, she is making a profit and I am saving money. I don't know why I resisted so much, since the price would have been even for me. We both stood there for a few moments once I finished with my bags, than I decided I would just walk home.

The second thing that happened was this.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Two's Company: Recipes for Intimate Entertaining

I found this book in a box by the side of the road. I probably should have left it there, because it looks like it will be almost entirely useless to me. Ten pages devoted to veal!

My favourite recipe:

Cantaloupe with port

1 fresh cantaloupe
4 tbsp. port

1) Halve cantaloupe and remove seeds.
2) Pour port into the centre of each half and refrigerate until serving time


Translation:
POUR BOOZE IN A MELON.

SERVE.


That's some intimate entertaining for you! Very classy.




Tuesday, October 20, 2009

I THINK I JUST COINED A WORD

Schemebags!

As in, those Tories are a bunch of dirty lying schemebags!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

babies

It recently came to my attention that this blog is the number two search result on google when searching "where do babies come out of in the mom"
initially i was confused "are really little kids using google? It took a few minutes for it to occur to me that people maybe searching for advice on how to approach the issue with their children.
As someone with no credentials and no children on her own here is my advice.
babies come from a stork. and thanks god for that because I would hate to have to really give birth or have stretch marks. I was so relieved when I found out that was a myth.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

VIDEO BLOG

Alex asked us to start a podcast, but Cailin doesn't want to.

Cailin and I have been discussing which names qualify for our future husbands. We think they should have the same name, to make life amusingly confusing. twin names! Here is part of the process!



(EDITED BY CAILIN TO ADD: If we get desperate, these unknown gentlemen might have to change their names... That's how committed we are to this future conversation;

RACHEL or CAILIN: I have bad news.

CAILIN or RACHEL: Oh no! What's wrong?

RACHEL or CAILIN: Andrew is having an affair.

CAILIN or RACHEL: Oh my god! I'm so sorry. Are you okay?

RACHEL or CAILIN: No, dear.. YOUR Andrew.

And then we will laugh and laugh and laugh. And then one of us might get divorced, but at least we'll have enjoyed a good joke.)

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Tuesday Oddity



This was the view from my kitchen window yesterday. For a moment I looked at the wires jutting out of the woman's hair and thought that man was reprogramming his robot-wife.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

A thing to blog about


RACHEL the maven of fashion and retail has informed me of one the greatest secrets you will ever hear.

People with small to regular sized feet can simply purchase their socks in the children's department and enjoy HUGE SAVINGS!!!!!!

HUGE SAVINGS!!!!!

HUGE SAVINGS!

And they fit your feet. Also, there is only ONE TAX on children's garments. I can't wait to get me some Jo-Bro socks.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

DRIVING A BIKE!


So it is settled, I am driving my bike.
Cailin and I discussed how often people tell me that I can't "drive a bike" well we looked up the definition of 'driving' and discovered that yes it is only called driving when involving a motor-vehicle, key word being motor. But what is the definition of motor is "anything that imparts motion". YES! from the Canadian Oxford Dictionary!
I figure, I'm on the road, beside other motor-vehicles, therefore I am driving.
discussion! To be honest I don't care much about this discussion, but it is another thing I always get wrong.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

BLOGGING

There are far too many pictures of Rachel on this blog.
I'm going to fix that now.


This is a portrait of a woman who has to Pee Real Bad Right Now, but doesn't want to move.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Two Good Sisters


I am taking a contemporary art class this semester. Everyone else in the class are artists accept me. We haven't passed Impressionism, and I am getting frustrated, I want to understand Duchamp and Man Ray and I plan on spending every Wednesday evening at the AGO studding.
Perhaps my favourite contemporary artist from Toronto is Katie Pretti. The subject of her mainly abstract work is sexuality and coming of age. Will Kucey writes "Pretti’s
work filters and mirrors the sensations and discomforts of emotional and physical experience." She playes with light and dark. I have been playing with the idea of investing in one of her pieces for a while.

Currently she has an exhibition at Le Gallery on Dundas street. Who wants to check it out with me before October 5th.

"There's a strong fiscally conservative argument for supporting the arts"

So many times have I listened to strong arguments explaining that supporting the arts should be part of even a conservative economic plan. But I have never heard a conservative say it. Something changed today!

this close to death

Hey everyone!
It is a shame that we rarely use this blog in recent months, and I hope that will soon no longer be the case!
Both bloggers are now living together in a modest apartment in Kensington market down town Toronto! Here is a short update on the housing process. We are trying to keep at 1970s found object vibe to the apartment. Almost everything we have was either found, thrift, or a gift.
Today we went to a local Portuguese shop that has lots of old house wear. I bought 4, Canadian coat of arms coasters, cera 1930s, there once! Today keeping with my obsession with Canadian paraphernalia I bought a plate.

Unfortunately after bringing the plate home I read "NOT FOR USE FOR SERVING FOOD". I would not have bought a purely decorative plate. I was planning on eating off it. I was concerned that perhaps the issues is that the plate may be poisons. I looked on the internet but unfortunately I can't find any information about the specific company Barton of Canada LTD. I did read that the colors used for the creation of decorative plates can contain heavy metals, which can easily pass into food and then into the body. There have been poisoning cases reported after people consumed food from decorative plates. Regular dishware presents no such risks.

In future I am going to have to remember to read the back of all plates I buy.

Rachel

Monday, September 21, 2009

DISCO BARONETTES IN THE T-DOT



GET READY TO READ TORONTO THINGS!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Nicorette statt Zigarette

I just did a google search and found that there are only 3,760 results for "nicorette inhaler tampon." So here I am, doing my part to raise that number. I'd like the world to be free of the scourge of cigarettes someday, so here's hoping that Nicorette takes this design flaw into account.

No one wants to look like a pervert sucking on a feminine hygiene product. As one blogger wrote "I'd rather die of lung cancer than have someone ask me; "Are you smoking a tampon?"

Friday, July 17, 2009

Advice to tv people















Peter Keleghan should be in all sitcoms.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Nasty Dan



I love the jargon Oscar uses in this video, it anchors the video in a time and place.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

This news has made me very sad.

God damn it. This one is going to hurt.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Breakfst at Sulimay's

I bet most people reading this (if anyone still reads this blog) have heard of Breakfast at Sulimay's, perhaps from Radio (CBC Radio 1 on Q) or with their own adventures on the internet.
I find it fun to try to predict how they will feel about each song. But I don't put much weight on their opinions. Perhaps I just don't want to legitimize them, since I often disagree, but i would like to believe their is a history, and relevance to music that perhaps these there individuals don't always get. Also I think sometimes the projection should be taken into greater consideration.



I am falling in love with Joe.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Who wants to give me $5000 US?


I want to take a flight on the zero g plane. I really want to. Really, really, really.

http://www.gozerog.com/

It would make suffering through parabola lessons in high school well worth it.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

If you're feeling depressed about Michael Jackson's death, at least you can take comfort in the fact that I've derived a little bit of good from all the attention it has been getting in the last few days.

Finally, FINALLY I have resolved something that has confused me since I was three years old.

Why, I wondered, have I got this strange memory of Michael Jackson and C-3pO giving me a personal tour of the EPCOT Center?


My family went to Disney World when I was three, and I now realize that what actually happened was that we saw this short film there. Somehow that mess of a production got mixed up in my little brain, causing me to leave with the impression that MJ and 3PO were working as Disney docents. You can't really blame me. I think that film would be confusing to adults. And the Star Wars rip-offs are hilariously blatant (Can I call them rip-offs if it was produced by George Lucas?)



I feel a little sad to have my amusing misconception cleared up. Kind of like the day I realized that the water tower near my house actually isn't an awesome, exclusive Dairy Queen in the sky.
Maybe this isn't actually a little bit of good like I said earlier. Maybe poor old Michael Jackson's just taking another piece of my childhood to the grave with him.

Oh wow, now I've depressed myself.



Ahhh. That's better.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Zack 16



Molly shared with me this great show that hilariously combines coming of age and puberty in a way both men and women can relate. check it out! Personally my favorite part may be the notes underneath each video so check out the website, zack16.com.

Monday, June 15, 2009

The Bpa ft. Dizzee Rascal & David Byrne

Bedtime routine

I feel slightly ashamed for sharing the following mundane information, but this thing happens to me so often that I'm hoping that making a record of it will help me to change my behaviour. This is blogging as self-help.

As I get ready to go to bed, I unthinkingly go through the regular routine of face washing, teeth brushing and flossing. I wash my hands, take out my contact lenses, and then I'm pretty much ready to be unconscious for a few hours.

Except, sometimes I forget that one crucial step of washing my hands after flossing. And the floss is coated with minty flavour for some reason. As soon as I stick my finger on to my eye, I realize my mistake because I suddenly feel like I've ground a box of tic-tacs into paste and smeared it across my eyeball.

Menthol on your eyeballs may sound refreshing, but it is actually a surprisingly poor bedtime soothing technique.

I know I should be more careful, or rearrange the routine, or get different floss, but I am stupid. And forgetful. But at least no one can accuse me of having smelly eyeballs.

Good night.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

June is now National Aboriginal History Month

New Democrat Crowder’s motion passes unanimously after two year struggle. Two provinces, Saskatchewan and Alberta, already celebrate June as Aboriginal History Month. I am rather disappointed in the other Provinces and Territories. if Alberta is considered the Texas of Canada, what is it doing being more progressive than everyone else?

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Queerly Canadain

This is an article from This Magazine, on how Canadian's (and others) have blinders on when it comes to Transgendered people. Not my favorite article ever, but gets one thinking about how we can readdress the issue of transgendered people in pop culture.
Transgendered people seem to be in the public eye a lot as of late. Another example i came across is Chastity Bono, the offspring of Duo Sonny and Cher, who has announced that formally she, now he, will be transitioning from a woman to a man.

We have Band

why we love and cheat!

10 things you didn't know

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Yet another thing on the internet I enjoyed

Michael Showalter Showalter

Michael Showalter interviews some comedy men. Jack McBrayer, Micheal Ian Black, David Cross, Mike Birbiglia, Andy Samberg, David Wain, Zach Galifianakis, Paul Rudd, and Michael Cera.


Tuesday, May 26, 2009

International Beauty Contest

I was brushing up on my world leader knowledge when I decided the endeavor was far too serious for my shallow brain. Instead of learning about important leaders and their issues and histories, why not just pick out the best looking ones and put them in a list! Yeah!

Here are the most attractive Presidents, Prime Ministers, Governors and Kings, as determined by me. This is based entirely on appearance, and has nothing to do with what kind of leader they may be.


MOZAMBIQUE
Prime Minister
Luisa Dias Diogo



NORWAY
Prime Minister
Jens Stoltenberg






ARGENTINA
President
Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner






SWAZILAND
King
Mswati III






MACEDONIA
Prime Minister
Nikola Gruevski






MONACO
Prince
Albert II






BURUNDI
President
Pierre Nkurunziza





ECUADOR
President
Rafael Correa Delgado





United States of America
President
Barack Obama






KIRIBATI
President
Anote Tong




CANADA
Governor General
Michaëlle Jean






BUTAN
Dragon King
Jigme Khesar
Namgyel Wangchuck





PHILLIPINES
President
Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo




UKRAINE
Prime Minister
Yuliya Tymoshenko





There you go. That was stupid. And FUN!

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Comparison


Who could ever guess that the impossibly pretty boy pictured above is Woody Allen's biological son?

Mia Farrow has the most powerful genes in the world.

Saturday, May 23, 2009


I just started reading The Audacity of Hope. I'm enjoying it so far. At one point Obama describes a trip he took with an aide to southern Illinois:

On the drive down, we stopped at a TGI Friday's and I ordered a cheeseburger. When the waitress brought the food I asked her if she had any Dijon mustard. Dan shook his head.

"He doesn't want Dijon," he insisted, waving the waitress off. "Here"—he shoved a yellow bottle of French's mustard in my direction—"here's some mustard right here."

The waitress looked confused. "We got Dijon if you want it," she said to me.

I smiled. "That would be great, thanks." As the waitress walked away, I leaned over to Dan and whispered that I didn't think there were any photographers around.

MY GOD! This man is completely obsessed with his spicy mustard! It's a running theme through his political/gastronomical career.

At least he's consistent with his condiment loyalties. That's how you know you can trust him.


Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Ha, ha, ha. Yes, I see. Very droll.

I realize that the complaint I am about to share is not original. I realize that many, many, people have said this before me. An episode of Seinfeld was even devoted to it. But I'm going to go ahead and throw this thought into the universe yet again. Because I can. And because evil must be pointed out over and over again if we hope to ever defeat it.

The New Yorker cartoons (often) make no sense, are not funny, and are designed to drive you INSANE.

Those bastards suck you in with their fantastic articles, and then give you this:



I always expect that some day they will reveal that their cartoon selection is a cruel sociological experiment designed to shortcircuit pretentious minds, but it seems that they actually choose them based on some sort of legitimate criteria that doesn't include their ability to send me into a fit of rage.

I heard an interview with the cartoon editor Robert Mankoff. Apparently this is his criteria:

1) He wants cartoons that communicate some idea through the medium of humour
2) He wants them to make a point
3) He wants them to have an enduring nature
4) He wants them to strike a chord
5) He wants them to have a distinctive voice

Those are noble goals! I can see why they get such satisfying results.

I shall never forget the meaning of that.

Friday, May 1, 2009

Silhouette Masterpiece Theatre!!



THIS IS MY NEW FAVOURITE THING ON THE INTERNET

Silhouette Masterpiece Theatre

Beautifully combining several of my favourite things: silhouettes, old-timey stuff, and jokes!

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Citizenship Rant

Conservatives order rewrite of 'insipid' citizenship guidebook

Canada's Minister of Citizenship and Immigration, Jason Kenney, sounds like a bit of an ass in this article.

The current guidebook for Canadian newcomers includes two pages on environmental stewardship and barely a mention of the Canadian military - and that has Jason Kenney hopping mad [...] As Kenney acerbically characterizes it, the booklet includes two pages "on recycling" - but "not one single sentence on Canadian military history."

I've been a Canadian citizen since 1993, and while I agree that the citizenship stuff I read at the time and in the years since could be described as somewhat "insipid," I take offense at the idea that focusing on things like the environment is "ridiculous," while lecturing about past wars is supposed to be a better way to introduce people to their new country.

It isn't that 1990's Liberal Canadian values are more "insipid" than 2000's Conservative Canadian values. It just that Canadian attempts to describe Canada are pretty much always gag-worthy in some way. The government, no matter who is in control, is always the most clichéd in this endeavour (except perhaps the CBC).* Insulting environmental stewardship in order to celebrate soldiers isn't going to change that. It's just exchanging one ideological emphasis for another, and if you ask me, the one that boasts of environmental responsibility and peacefulness is more valuable than the one that salutes military achievement.

I'm not saying that knowledge of military history isn't important, it's just not as important for the future of Canada as the topic the Minister singles out for derision. I believe that Canadians should know about Canadian history, including the good and the bad. I doubt, however, that along with the story of Vimy Ridge immigrants will learn about Japanese internment camps. I doubt that in addition to the importance of the poppy as a symbol, the new booklet will mention much about the residential school system. Unless I'm proven wrong and they somehow don't pick and choose the version of Canada they want to convey, I say give me a break, Minister! The changes you are planning are almost certainly going to be "a small-c conservative, partisan [and] ideological project." Don't pretend otherwise. Your version of Canada will be just as "insipid" as the old one, just in a conservative way.

And I don't see how this will "foster greater integration of immigrants" and improve "social cohesion."

In fact, I can feel my immigrant self dis-integrating as I write this! Thanks a bunch, Conservatives! You are ruining my cohesion, socially speaking.

*Don't get me wrong, I really like the CBC. I just can't stand to hear them talk about 'what it means to be Canadian' and stuff like that. It is just too self-congratulatory for me to stomach.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Rights

I am so angry with the new laws in Afghanistan. Women are not allowed to refuse their husband sex. Women have been protesting the new laws, but were met with violence.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Inspiration

Good Lord!

I recently posted a link to one of my favourite dooce stories here. I've been reading dooce for about four years now, after I accidentally got sucked into a few mommy blogs when one writer I enjoyed had a kid. I've always felt a bit odd about this, being in my late teens/early twenties and (thankfully) having no children. But they are amusing. And interesting. And their kids are cute. So whatever. Stop judging me.

In case you are not as familiar with this genre as I am, dooce is their queen. She started blogging as a young single woman in L.A, got fired from her job for writing things about co-workers, got married, had a kid, had postpartum depression and became extremely popular along the way.

I knew her site got a huge amount of traffic and that its ads paid enough for her husband to quit his job. Even so, when I once read somebody's garbled rant about how much she sucks and that she makes millions of dollars I mentally rolled my eyes. There is no way she earns that much, I thought. This angry internet person has no concept of reality/finance.

And then Oprah/CNN goes and tells me that dooce.com brings in 40 000 advertising dollars a month! A MONTH!

I repeat, Good Lord!

In conclusion, expect either Rachel or I to suddenly have babies and dramatically improve our writing. Also, I am off to join a wacky religion now, so that I can later abandon it and mock it in an amusing fashion. Right now I've only got second-hand Salvation Army jokes, and I don't think they measure up to the Mormon goldmine.

Friday, April 17, 2009

Good

The Deadly Nightshades had his on their blog, I wanted to share.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

National High Five Day


Happy National High Five Day!

HIGHFIVE!

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

attack adds

Elizabeth May explained today that attack adds work, because they reduce voter turnout. don't let them get you, stay informed even outside of election times and remember to always take advantage of your place in democracy.

lululemon

what we missed.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Post of Sound - Ronettes, Spector, Crystals













I just learned that Estelle Bennett (on the right side of picture) of the Ronettes died a couple months ago.
Her life was shitty after the group split, but at least she had memories like this:


Since thinking about The Ronettes leads me to thinking about Phil Spector, I want to recommend The Sound of Young America interview with Mick Brown, a Spector biographer. It's an interesting interview, especially if you don't know much about his crazy life story.

Lastly, here is one of the weirdest pop songs I've heard, He Hit Me (It Felt Like A Kiss):

It was written as a protest against abuse, but it's very odd to hear coming from the same women who sang the fluffy "Da doo ron ron."

EDIT: Wow, I made a timely blog post without even realizing it! Phil Spector found guilty of murder today.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

STI

Did you know:

-Half of all sexually active people will have a sexually transmitted disease (STD) by age 25?
- One new STD infection occurs every two or three seconds in the U.S.?
- Many STIs have no symptoms, so most new infections go undiagnosed?


There are many ways for you to participate. First (and most important): GYT! STI testing is easy and quick (promise!). You can ask your regular doctor for STI testing or make an appointment at your local Planned Parenthood health center.



And for more information on ST!s, check out plannedparenthood.org, or use The Check, the awesome new interactive risk assessment tool.

STIs are a total drag, but the only thing worse than having one is having one and not knowing it. Getting tested not only allows you to have piece of mind and/or identify an existing infection so it can be treated, but it's also a great opportunity to talk with your health care provider and learn more about ST!s and ways to lower your risk. Make an appointment to Get Yourself Tested today! Trust me: safer sex is better sex!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Buddha's Birthday!

Today is Buddha's Birthday!
Happy Birthday Siddhattha Gotama!

don't block my facebook.

I just read (yes read) an article on Why goofing off boosts productivity.

another great way to break up your work day.

Embrace

Is this becoming a horribly predictable music blog? I sincerely hope so. Today I share with you Embrace ft. Ladyhawke

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

No House Work Day


Today is no house work day!

Last week I saw a movie that relates to this topic,

Jeanne Dielman, 23 Quai du Commerce, 1080 Bruxelles.

made in 1975.
The film is often compared to late Hitchcock films, it is also an early feminist film. A real-time chronicle of this woman’s highly ordered day-to-day routine, the mundane details of housework. This housework is the primary subject of the horror show. Thought the film may be difficult to sit through I recommend it, especially right to the very end.

In honor of No house work day, let us not do any house work, perhaps watch Jeanne Dielman, 23 Quai du Commerce, 1080 Bruxelles, and not do any house work.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Drowsy Driving Awareness Day

Happy Drowsy Driving Awareness Day.

SUN

loved the U2- Get On your Boots (Justice Remix)! (totally stole this from Roger)

at Mola Super Poco

love Paul Rudd as much as you?

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Kurt Vile

My friend Jesse sent me this link, I am so excited that he thought of me when sharing such an exciting find. He explained that in this son Vile uses old lyrics of his that never made it into other songs. Those of you who read stereogum.com might find this redundant, but its a great song.

sxsw preview :: kurt vile at Gorilla Vs. Bear

Saturday, April 4, 2009


I tried to make latkes yesterday, and it was not a success. Some good came of the attempt though, because it reminded me of a little book I'd flipped through while Christmas shopping. I chuckled to myself as I scraped those crumbly potato pancakes into the garbage.

Friday, April 3, 2009

Alcohol-free weekend.



This weekend is Alcohol-free weekend.
who will be celebrating?

This is particular a good idea if you have any interest in participating in 'social behavior' and not crime. BBC

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Mysteries of the Universe

Why is it that when other people quote The Simpsons it is irritating, but when I do it is totally fresh and amusing?

"Keep watching the skiiiiiis!
"

See what I mean? You really enjoyed that!

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

April is Deaf History Month

RACHEL - HAPPY DEAF HISTORY MONTH!

ps. this is not an April fools joke.



CAILIN - My English Great Grandfather and Irish Great Grandmother were both deaf. His father beat him to deaf* after he hit a policeman in the head with a snowball, and I believe she was born without hearing. They met at a school for the deaf in South Africa, and raised four boys. I sometimes wonder what that must have been like... I imagine it was difficult. But I can't confirm that because they are all long dead. Lost to Deaf History.

* That is an awful joke. Sorry. And yet not sorry enough to delete it...

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

beaton


Does someone want to get me the Kate Beaton Book? Okay she is still in the process of making them, but keep it in mind. In the mean time I would still be interested in other swag. Maybe i will visit the Maritime Museum of BC in honor of Beaton instead.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Daily Holidays

This was part of Smart Pretty Awkward. She recommended that if you want to text someone, but have nothing to say to them, text them a random holiday. Apparently today is Doctor's Day. But since I am not too Impressed with that lets try for something else, checkout daily holidays.

Avaaz

remember the other day when I linked to Avaaz.org? Well at some point, I donated a ridiculous sum of money to an organization I know nothing about. Turns out they appear to be an interesting and positive organization so YEAH! This is the problem with never reading anything. can you imagine, I spend my days avoiding reading, attempting to understand without reading. Specific words and numbers jump out at me and I attempt to put them together to create meaning. Bigger and and more distinct words jump put. I think this also explains why I add random capitals, I am attempting to make a less visually distinctive word stand out. I ignore the other words and pay little to no attention to sentences or sentence structure. It is rather embarrassing. When reading, reading, I must mentally say, now read the words in order. I guess it is similar to having to tell someone to breath. This may explain the spastic nature of my entries.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Blog recommendations

RACHEL: Molly shared with me this great easy to read blog Smart Pretty and Awkward. I makes me want to improve my life using Emilie's handy-dandy tips! Check it out!

CAILIN: I think this post, "A Story About Someone Else's Ass", by the very popular blogger Heather Armstrong, is the funniest poop-related thing I've ever read. A milestone in the history of Poop-Lit.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Where the wild things are.

I always get angry when a great book is being turned into a movie. I understand the appeal, but i hate the idea of running the reputation of the book, and applying a new vision on an already good thing. I was therefore a little disappointed when I heard, many moons ago about the Where the wild things are movie. But the fact that Spike Jonze was directing it seemed promising. Rumor has it that Jonze and the studio had some problems. The Trailer looks great, and i hope the movie is as good.

Friday, March 27, 2009

SAVE THE CBC

For those of you who don't know... I AM A CBC FIEND. This means that I have been on the verge of tears over the CBC layoffs.
Well I was informed that there is a way for concerned Canadians to make a small difference. Let us SAVE THE CBC, and sign this petition!

Today at 10am, did anyone listen to CBC radio 1, Q with Jian? Well if you did you would have heard a show in front of an audience. Guess who was in that audience?!? ME! and some awesome friends. We are all recent Toronto to Vancouver transplants, and felt a huge tension with all the Toronto vs Vancouver discussions. But two of us live in the West end, with Torquil Campbell (congratulations) and that MLA Spencer Herbert (what a cutie). After the show two of my friends went up and talked to Jian, I was not interested in lining up to talk to the man I hope to marry.
New Goal: run into Jian some time during JUNO weekend.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Pearson

I'm reading a Lester B. Pearson bio right now, and am soon going to be spouting off random Pearson facts for the pleasure and edification of everyone I know.

Since this blog is listed on a couple of Guelph feeds, I'll treat you to a tidbit of local history. After returning from WWI and finishing his B.A at U of T, Pearson joined the Guelph Maple Leafs baseball team as an infielder.
I guess that team morphed into the Guelph Royals at some point. Their wikipedia page is difficult to understand. But I did find this amusing fact there: "In the summer of 1873, the Boston Red Stockings, the defending National Association champs, paid a visit to Guelph and whipped the Maple Leafs 27-8."

The Guelph Maple Leafs v. The Boston Red Stockings!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Sweet Juniper


I have loved Detroit ever since i visited as a young girl. There is the beautiful degradation that i had never seen before. Southern Ontario is so different. I guess i grew up in privilege, but always knew there were other ways to live.
It is this overwhelming longing for the working class that has led me to love Diner's, Johnny Cash, and 'different class' by pulp. I love how when people stop paying attention nature takes back space.
Well a hilariously adorable young dad takes photos and writes about Detroit on Sweet Juniper!
Apparently Jim has a photo of a Tree growing out of abandoned school books.
In an interview on the radio with Jian, Jim explains that he wanted to raise his kids in a place that looks like what the rest of the world looks like. His most recent entry is hilariously cute, thank Q for binging me to this great website.

Your source for highbrow entertainment

Teenage Boy Comedy

"60-foot comedy painting on roof"

Monday, March 23, 2009

War Crimes

On learning that George W. Bush had visited the Texas of Canada, Alberta, I was disgusted, but something super fundamental did not occur to me. Was Bush ever fearful of being arrested for war crimes? Andrew Morrison poetically espresses Canada's failure to make history. Despite the Canadian police not arresting Bush, I also am curious if it would have been possible for someone to have made a citizen's arrest. Could we have all missed the boat?

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Hitler-swoggled AGAIN! Damn you neo-Nazis!!!!

Have you ever typed something innocuous into google, clicked on a promising looking link without looking at the url, and then as you start to read you think, "hey, this is... a bit racist. Oh wow, that's a hateful thing to say... oh... HOLY SHIT WHAT AM I READING HERE?!" and then glance at the address bar only to discover that you've stumbled on to Stormfront (wiki link)?

This has happened to me several times since I began using the internet, so I think it must be a fairly regular occurrence. I think this unfortunate phenomenon needs a name, if it doesn't have one already. Stormfronted? Nazi duped? Google linKKKed? Hitler-swoggled?

Speaking of surprise racism, I'm reminded of the hilarious Peep Show, and poor Mark's realization that his new friend is a white supremacist.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q1TTxj2q6eE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XOsLZ0lSqpg

"Yeah... That's not on, is it?"

Saturday, March 14, 2009

I agree

From youngamerican on twitter:

Jon Stewart practices the Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer style of gotcha journalism. "I'm just a comedian..."

Google Mars



Today is not just Stevan's Birthday but the 174th Birthday of Giovanni Schiaparelli who drew a detailed map of Mars in 1890.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

MARCH

WOMEN MONTH!
HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN DAY!

Friday, March 6, 2009

Miley gets dissed by RadioHead?



there are so many things in this interview that will make you laugh and frustrated. WOW i hate american radio. Also a short synopsis here.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

where do babies come from?

http://overheardintheward.com/

4-year-old boy:
How do the babies get in your tummy?
Mom: They grow in my tummy
4-year-old boy: No, but how do they get in there?
Mom: After a mommy and a daddy get married in the temple they decide to have babies come to their family.
4-year-old boy: No, how does the baby get in?
Mom: The daddy helps the mommy get the baby in her tummy then the baby grows bigger and bigger until mommy goes to the hospital and the doctor helps the baby come out.
4-year-old boy: How does the baby come out?
Mom: The doctor helps it come out.
4-year-old boy: But, where does it come out?
Mom: From my tummy.
4-year-old boy: But your tummy doesn’t have any cracks in it… where does it come out?
Mom: Mommy’s have a special place where babies come out.
4-year-old boy: Only mommy’s have it?
Mom: Yes.
4-year-old boy: I want to see it.
Mom: Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
4-year-old boy: Next time you are in the hospital I want to come and see where the baby comes out.
Mom: Hmm. That might be interesting… actually when your wife is going to have a baby and you are big like Daddy, then you can go to the hospital and see where the baby comes out.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Target Women

Happy discovery time! I've just been introduced to Target Women, a series which mocks irritating marketing geared toward women. It's funny!



Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Sunday, February 22, 2009

PANIC! PANIC! PANIC! But whatever you do, don't lose your cool.

Introducing GM’s latest, greatest product!

The all new
2009 Cognitive Dissonance is jam packed with distressing features and conflicting emotions!

Let the auto industry take you on an exciting, terrifying journey!

Now you can go from pitying laid off workers, to raging against the incompetency of CEOs, to fearing for your own job if the economy collapses, and finally to the bitter indignation caused by the fact that our society depends on alienating and polluting vehicles in the first place!

Your head will spin, your heart will wrench and your nerves will be shot... all in less time than it takes to listen to the evening news!


And don't forget, any negativity and money hoarding will only make things worse, you fools!

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Julian, that is a very homosexual question.

It's a well established fact that Mugabe is an idiot, but this little anecdote still made me chuckle:


At one point I put it to him: "Do you ever get out? Do you ever see the appalling state of your schools and hospitals?"

He said to me, "Julian, that is a very homosexual question."

At that time, the [British] government of Tony Blair contained a couple of ministers who were homosexual.

Mr Mugabe referred to them as "the gay mafia". He thought homosexuals were out to get him.

And therefore anybody who criticised him became "homosexual".

- JULIAN MARSHALL, BBC FOCUS ON AFRICA PRODUCER, 1975-90


I love that his mind is exactly like that of an immature fifth grade boy.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Museum of Broken Relationships

A man and a women in Croatia is travailing the world with The Museum of Broken Relationships. It was a concept created to help people deal with breakups. The two of them don't like the traditional destroy and prepare for 'new' method of therapy. Distraction does not allow one of remember the good parts of the relationship nor does it highlight the learning experiences. This Museum is a great way of making bringing broken hearts together so that they no longer feel alone. Each object is donated by someone locally alone with a story about the relationship it was a part of. Currently the exhibit is in San Francisco at the Root Division gallery.

A favorite is the prosthetic leg.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Pepsi!

This is funny. Someone, possibly the people who created the new, awful Pepsi logo, have released a pdf of a redesign presentation. It is great, especially when a diagram illustrates Pepsi's gravitational pull in the shopping aisle.

Please ignore all the silly commentators (and the poster) on Brand New who have no sense of humour and don't understand that this is a joke.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Good news


iTunes helpfully informs me that Dinah Shore's recording of "Daisy Bell" (aka A Bicycle Built for Two) is CLEAN.

Thank goodness. I am so sick of the curse-filled rants that filthy woman tried to pass off as 'songs.'

Monday, February 9, 2009

marriage

When i read that the Feministing.com contributor Ann said she cried when she saw this video, i admit i scoffed, cried? really?
well for the record i CRIED! CRIED A BUNCH! It is so powerful! Please watch.


"Fidelity": Don't Divorce... from Courage Campaign on Vimeo.

Also my mother recommended the film "Wendy and Lucy" she has not seen it but
apparently a superb film let's see it?

Sunday, February 8, 2009

FUCK YOU!

Truthfully one of the main reasons i am linking this video is the song at the end. Thank You Feministing!

Virginity!

A friend of mine shared this with me. A 22 year old women, is selling off her virginity. She has a B.A. in Women's Studies, and is looking at her virginity as an opportunity to test societies feelings around virginity.
I had not hear about it prior to being send this link.
When i read the headline i was disgusted. than after reading a sentence or two i gained new respect for the woman selling her virginity.
I remember during early high school friend of mine joking about doing a similar thing. One can sell anything, why not their virginity.
We equated it to prostitution though.
I applaud Natalie Dylan, though i fundamentally worry about the commodification of everything. As she explains, virginity as always been a commodity, but historically it was sold by a father to a husband. I hope she writes a paper on her experience.

Homecoming


















Hello internet. I am returned.


I've just spent the last couple of weeks in sunny South Africa. I sunned myself under the blazing sun. The sun shone bright, except during the solar eclipse. My parents' son searched for solar panels, and bought himself sunglasses. Sun sun sun.

Sun sun sun.

I apologize for all the sun chat, but I'm just trying to keep the memory alive as I brace myself for the rest of winter in Canada. Canadians, do you remember the sun? He says hey.

Because I am lazy, here are lists:

South Africa Trip '09 - Pros
  • Beautiful scenery
  • Meeting relatives
  • Seeing African animals in non-zoo settings
  • Warm ocean
  • Cheap booze
  • Mountains! Everywhere you look!
  • Seeing birthplace, old house, grandparents' house etc.
  • Ability to instantly charm strangers when traveling with friendly 16 month old baby girl
  • Biltong stores, stalls, and trucks (in style of ice-cream truck) everywhere
  • Koeksisters in grocery stores, melktert on dessert menus
  • Amusing violations of road rules
South Africa Trip '09 - Cons
  • Bizarre accidental bra strap tan
  • Terrorized by jellyfish
  • Terrorized by fleas
  • Terrorized by Appletiser. South Africans, you need to work on your beverage standards. Appletiser is not apple juice, Sprite is not "the same as lemonade."
  • Everyone sounding like they are related to me, accent-wise
  • Horrifying story of old apartheid injustice coming out at unexpected moment
  • Seeing poverty while in process of spending, spending, spending
  • Stolen cellphone
  • Being told that "Strong women in positions of power aren't women anymore. They are unpleasant men. But even so, I'd still have chosen Hillary over Obama."
  • AIDS jokes
Overall, it really is a great place to visit. Cape Town is just astonishingly beautiful. I'm sure I'll have more to say about my trip in the days to come. It may take me a while to process things though.



Friday, January 23, 2009

Eight Maps!

EightMaps.com
Now we can go to the houses of people in California and slap the people do donated to support Proposition 8. I suggest we slap them once for ever dollar they donated.
Lynette Atkisson, Homemaker, gets 5000 slaps for the $5 000 she donated!

Okay maybe i shouldn't be encouraging this violence. But i like the idea that these people can not be anonymous and people can change their behavior to show there dissatisfaction. Perhaps we should no longer support Full-screenVisionary Electronics, Inc. and Blackford Construction. If you are friends with Adam Haleck, Real Estate Developer, tell him how you feel, and maybe don't have him represent you when you are selling your California house. This is how politics inform your daily life. It is not okay if someone doesn't believe homosexual people are equal, and i am not going to let people think that it won't affect how i associate with people with busnesses and people based on what they suport.