OUTRAGES UPON OUTRAGES

I am steaming mad!

I just saw an ad saying that if you walk into a Starbucks in the USA on Tuesday and tell them you voted, you'll get a free tall coffee.

EXCUSE ME, WE HAD AN ELECTION HERE TOO, YOU KNOW. Where the hell was MY free coffee on October 14th?

Hardly anyone voted, so it wouldn't have cost much anyway. (Just 59.1%, or 13,832,972 people. That's like, Pennsylvania, for any American readers.)

This is the straw (or absent stir-stick) that broke this camel's back. We put up with a lot from our friends down south, and purchase many coffee-related products in this country. Why will no massive coffee merchants, be they Starbucks or Tim Horton's, step up to the plate and reward me for doing my civic duty? Americans are all charged and excited to vote without the incentive. Canadian voters, however, are so damn lazy that they were probably all in coffee shops that day anyway. If dear Starbucks cared so much about democracy, it would have been nice if they had encouraged those who were actually appallingly apathetic this election season, instead of those who are already having all the fun.

But seriously, I'd like a free coffee.