Victorians!

I recently went for a quick jaunt to New York City. Normally I try to pack as much as I possibly can into short trips to great cities, but this time I was forced to relax and accept a slower pace, since I was visiting family.

I did manage to spend a few quality hours in the Metropolitan Museum of Art though.

We meet at last.

What a place. Obviously, I only saw a tiny fraction of their collection. And being me, I focused on the 19th century paintings and raced through the European paintings. HIGHLY SATISFYING.

I was very excited to stumble into a exhibition called Playing with Pictures: The Art of Victorian Photocollage.

Friends, this is so in my wheelhouse.

Victorian!

Photo!

COLLAAAAAGE!

God, I love this stuff. It's so whimsical and creepy. I love the idea of these wealthy, leisured women taking the stern photos of their important relatives and acquaintances and sticking them on ridiculous drawings.

Terry Gilliam practically had all his work done for him.

The Reverse Geocache Puzzle

I just read about a cool project called the Reverse Geocache Puzzle. This man assembled a gift box which is locked from the inside and can't be opened until it is taken to a certain location.

Who knew what fun people would have with GPS...

Anyway, I stumbled upon this story through the writings of a man who plans to put a ring in his own puzzle box, and use it to propose to his girlfriend in a special location.

As it says in the follow up to the original story, "it’s the perfect combination of mystery, software, romance, and mechatronics."

Awwww. Nerds in love are the best.

Who wants to give me $5000 US?

I want to take a flight on the zero g plane. I really want to. Really, really, really.

http://www.gozerog.com/

It would make suffering through parabola lessons in high school well worth it.

Homecoming

Hello internet. I am returned.


I've just spent the last couple of weeks in sunny South Africa. I sunned myself under the blazing sun. The sun shone bright, except during the solar eclipse. My parents' son searched for solar panels, and bought himself sunglasses. Sun sun sun.

Sun sun sun.

I apologize for all the sun chat, but I'm just trying to keep the memory alive as I brace myself for the rest of winter in Canada. Canadians, do you remember the sun? He says hey.

Because I am lazy, here are lists:

South Africa Trip '09 - Pros

• Beautiful scenery
• Meeting relatives
• Seeing African animals in non-zoo settings
• Warm ocean
• Cheap booze
• Mountains! Everywhere you look!
  
• Seeing birthplace, old house, grandparents' house etc.
• Ability to instantly charm strangers when traveling with friendly 16 month old baby girl
• Biltong stores, stalls, and trucks (in style of ice-cream truck) everywhere
• Koeksisters in grocery stores, melktert on dessert menus
  
• Amusing violations of road rules

South Africa Trip '09 - Cons

• Bizarre accidental bra strap tan
• Terrorized by jellyfish
• Terrorized by fleas
• Terrorized by Appletiser. South Africans, you need to work on your beverage standards. Appletiser is not apple juice, Sprite is not "the same as lemonade."
  
• Everyone sounding like they are related to me, accent-wise
• Horrifying story of old apartheid injustice coming out at unexpected moment
  
• Seeing poverty while in process of spending, spending, spending
• Stolen cellphone
• Being told that "Strong women in positions of power aren't women anymore. They are unpleasant men. But even so, I'd still have chosen Hillary over Obama."
• AIDS jokes

Overall, it really is a great place to visit. Cape Town is just astonishingly beautiful. I'm sure I'll have more to say about my trip in the days to come. It may take me a while to process things though.

John Keats: Poet, Lover, Ghost.

(Those who know me in person, and thus on facebook, may be familiar with this material which originated in a photo album in 2006. I think it's time I share this with the rest of the world as well.)

We all know John Keats as the tragic romantic poet who died of consumption before his pen had glean’d his teeming brain. Now get ready to see a whole new side of Keats! A semi-transparent ghosty side!

*WARNING: Easily frightened individuals please empty bowels prior to viewing this album. It's SPOOK-tacular!

Location: Keats House, Your Nightmares

Innocent Romantic poetry enthusiast Cailin ______ sets out to visit the Hampstead home where Keats wrote many of his important works, like 'Ode to a Nightingale." Little does she expect to find GHOSTLY TERROR on this sunny afternoon...

















Back entrance? Why?

Because the front is haunted.













































LOOK! JOHN KEATS' GHOST!

This is an undoctored photo. Maybe it's a sun glare, but that seems unusual, because I've been using this digital camera for several years and never had a mark like that appear before.

Logical answer:
IT'S KEATS' GHOST SITTING UNDER THE PLUM TREE, ETERNALLY REWRITING MY FAVOURITE POEM.

Travel Diary

I am so bad at diary-keeping. I spent a semester in London a couple years ago, and the journal I promised to store my memories in is ridiculously skimpy and vague.

One page reads,

Sunday September ?
Kenwood House, Hampstead Heath:

I am so tired. A man said "Jolly Good" to me.

Keats House:

[Just a smudge of soil on the page labelled "Keats Dirt!"]

The only time I got some serious ink down on the page was while I was trapped on a long bus ride from London to the Lake District. Even then, the diary mainly consists of strange ramblings, rather than insightful travel logging

October 17, 2006

Here I am again, setting out on yet another crazy lone adventure [...]I'm feeling like a bit of an idiot for taking a coach to Keswick. Christ, this is going to be a long ride. Also, I stink of orange.
NO! I am determined to enjoy myself like never before!!!!
Weee! Hurrah!

- omg, these seats recline! GLORY HALLY-LU-YA! This improves things immensely

- I'm so lazy. My brain is a blob of mush.
[drawing of a brain, with sections labelled:

• sleepin'
  
• slackin'
  
• procrastinatin'
• chillin'
  
• messin'
  
• skivin'
  
• thinkin']

- There are so many old ladies doddering about these North London streets. What's up with that?

- The woman behind me doesn't care for dimly lit cafes. She likes to see what's on her plate!

- I want my first husband to be named George, so that if I'm widowed I can mourn "Darling George" for years, just like Amelia Sedley in Vanity Fair, or Rose Nylund in Golden Girls

- I wonder how much the drivers earn?

Agghh! I want to not be on this bus anymore, thanks. This has been a total old ladies wagon. When the old ladies get off at their stops they have people waiting for them with hugs and probably cars and hot dinners.
Bleh. I am jealous of old ladies because at best I'll find a McDonalds, then walk in the rain and dark to a mysterious hostel which may be difficult to find.
And I'm ALONE, ALOOOONE!

Starting to get motion sickness!
FUCK WHY IS THIS ROAD SO WINDING? I bet it is charming in daylight, but right now I FUCKING DESPISE IT."

Can't wait to show this writing to my grandchildren. Although, in a later entry on the same journey I describe the scenery as "outrageously bucolic." I think that turn of phrase alone should get me some offers from the travel mags.

P.S. I have just looked it up, and contrary to my statement in October 2006, George was Blanche's husband, not Rose's.

Overheard on a train

"He looks cool, but he's kinda bad. But good is better than bad. And he's gooder than he is bad."

- Young boy, describing the complexities of a Yu-Gi-Oh! character


"I see the mountain of doom!"

- Same boy, looking out the window at Montreal

"I see the mountain of history!"

- His twin sister

These kids were great, until about half an hour into the ride, at which point I wanted to gag their mouths.

SuperPost

Rachel and I have set up a heck of a lot of categories in this here blog. Time to cram them all into one SUNDAY SUPER POST, random point-form style.

AFRICA

• As much as I agree with Palin that her fellow republicans are jerks for spreading rumours about her dumb questions during her debate prep, I have to profusely thank Americans for not electing a V.P with such a pitful understanding of Africa.

ART

• Hey! art’s great! Am I right?

BOOKS

• Currently reading Watchmen, thanks to Rachel. It’s starting up pretty slowly so far, and I’m looking forward to more action. I have to say that Rorschach was a great idea for a character, visually.
  

CAILIN

• I wonder how many people are actually called Cailin in Ireland? (It’s Irish for “girl”)

COMEDY


COMIC

• If it is at all possible that you are not yet aware of The Perry Bible Fellowship, get reading.

ENGLISH

• I had NO IDEA James Joyce was such a dirty, dirty man. If you’ve seen his love letters to Nora Barnacle, you know what I’m talking about.

ENVIRONMENT

• I wonder if the fact that my new low-flow shower head requires me to take about three times as long to wash my hair as it used to cancels out the water I’m supposed to be saving in the first place...

FASHION

• You know how JFK destroyed the hat industry by strutting around bare-headed? I’m hoping Obama also makes some huge male fashion impact. At the moment, I’m rooting for him just bringing the hat back.

GOSSIP GIRL

• haven’t seen the show yet, but that one brunette looks like a doll. This is my insightful observation!

JAMIE TUBBS

• I just accidentally typed “Jamir Tibbs.” That would make a great alter ego.

JOKES

• D.L Hughley’s are not funny.

LOGO

• At least if you got McCain's campaign logo tattooed on your body you can pretend you were in the navy or something...

MOVIES

• Anybody seen that “Nick and Nora” Micheal Cera one? How was it? I can’t see it because the title alone enrages me. Nick and Nora Charles forever!

MUSIC

• It’s been pretty great listening to civil rights movement music this week.

POLITICS

• I missed the last Liberal leadership convention since I was abroad at the time, so I never saw how handsome that Gerard Kennedy is. I mean, he’s no Justin Trudeau, but you take what you can get.

• Also, did anyone ever chant Hur-RAE, Hur-RAE for Bob Rae?

POLL

• Ah, how I will miss CNN’s POLL of POLLS.

QUOTES

• “ Just had a great lunch. Wham, bam, thank you ham!” - Jordan Morris, via twitter. He makes me laugh.

RACHEL

• What a pal! What an asset to civilization!

ROMANCE

• So many great romantic tales seem to hedge on circumstances that could have been altered by the slightest thing, like missing a certain bus or leaving a party early. Makes one wonder if, say, an ill-timed Steve Irwin impersonation might have cost one one’s soul mate. One would feel like a real jackass if that were true. One would indeed.

Good thing God doesn’t ever confirm such things. "THOU HAST TOTALLY BLOWN THY ONE CHANCE FOR TRUE LOVE, THOU IDIOT.”


SARAH PALIN

• She should get to keep the clothes. Come on!

TELEVISION

• I miss Mad Men.

TRAVEL

• I just watched a video of Obama playing basketball, and it looks like his buddies are letting him win. Unless he is the best at all things?

• The travel connection: I’m pretty sure traveling is something basketballers do.

VIDEO GAMES

• I could go for some treasure mountain.

ZIMBABWE

• is Ewbabmiz backwards!

Phew, this was difficult. Good Night.

Montreal